Fire and Ice: Battle of the Ages
by Monkey221
Summary: Warning: This is extremely hilarious and will include mucho parody. Elsa and Leo duel - no explanation needed. Get ready for puns and mindless dueling. Please read and review on what you think. First story!
1. Introduction

**Hi, this is Monkey221 and this is my first story on FanFiction!**

 **Disclaimer: All characters go to Rick** **Riordan and Disney or... all the other people who I'm not going to bother mentioning.**

 **Let's GGOOO!**

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 **Elsa**

We were just having a cup of ice cold coffee when a bunch of weird kids on a giant flying... thing appeared! There was this GIANT shadow and I had NO idea what was going on! And the thing started torching my ice palace and it WASN'T okay!

"Festus! Stop it! Stop! That's someone else's property! No! Stop!" One of the weird kids yelled at the... thing.

Suddenly the... thing started to descend right toward me and I could see now that it was some kind of dragon!

And out of nowhere, two MORE rambunctious teens came and shouted, "P.S. This isn't _How To Train Your Dragon._ " Then they quickly left.

"Okay..." I was getting a little freaked out. Then Anna came out came out with Olaf and Sven and said, "Do you wanna build a snowman?"

Out of nowhere, one of the weird kids jumped off the dragon and screamed, "No, I _don't_ want to build a snowman! Jason has been raging about that movie ever since it came out and Im _sick of it!_ "

Then he stopped. "I'm Leo."

"I'm Elsa," I paused. "Wanna duel?"

"Flame on!" A crazy light came into his eyes and I was actually intimidated. He suddenly threw a ball of fire at me and I realized that... well, it was fire. And fire is hot. And fire is bad. Very bad.

I shot back with ice crystals, but he quickly reacted to them. Suddenly, a gust of wind shot through the air, changing the course of the crystals.

Someone screamed in the background. "I'll get you, Elsa!" It was the lighting person... definitely not Hans... or maybe the cameraman.

Then all of the weird kids in their weird glory yelled, "Oh, look, the duel's about to start."

A girl with choppy brown hair yells, "Places, everyone, it's about to start!"

And the pre-duel show began.

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 **Hope you liked!**

 **Review for more weird stuff.**

 **-Monkey221**


	2. The Pre-duel Show

**Back with another chapter because that first one was short.**

 **Hope y'all enjoyed the last chapter. Yeah, it was rushed and weird, but who cares? (Not me.)**

 **Next chapter - Chapter Two!**

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 _"Annabeth, we roll in 3, 2, aaaand, 1."_

 ***lights up on a stage with a desk***

"Hello, and welcome to Fire and Ice: Battle of the Ages Pre-duel Show! I'm your host, Annabeth Chase, reporting to you from the palace of Arendelle, where it is safe and I can't get hurt. We have an excellent match-up tonight: Leo Valdez, Son of Hephaestus, fire-user, and Hero of Olympus, against Elsa whatever-her-last-name-is, Queen of Arendelle, user of ice and snow! We will be getting live reports from shape-shifter Frank Zhang, who, as an eagle wearing a camera, is giving us feedback on the battle." She gestured to a screen to her left.

"As you can see here, Leo is getting some emotional support from his charmer, Piper McLean. He gets motivated very well, as he is forced to by Piper's charmspeak." She looked to her side. "Now, we'll have a brief interruption for the match's weather by Hazel Levesque, our meteorologist. Hazel?"

The camera switched to a young girl wearing a black parka with a fuzzy hood. It looked like she was on mountain. "Thanks, Annabeth. As you can see, I'm on the very mountain where today's duel will take place. Now, it looks as if it will snow all day, but while Leo is up here, the storms may quiet down and the temperature will get higher. But for Elsa's sake, there will be a few scattered flurries. Back to you, Annabeth."

"Wow, Hazel. That's a lot of scattered weather, but in this situation, it makes a lot of sense. The countdown 'til the duel is now 14 minutes and 54 seconds." Annabeth points to the right hand corner of the screen where the countdown is. "As it gets closer to the duel, the temperatures are rising. And we all know who that's from! Ha ha! Now we are going to go to Jason where he will be interviewing our two duelers, and seeing how they are getting ready. Jason?

The camera is now on a teenage boy with blonde hair, wearing a SPQR shirt and he is the son of Zeus. "Thanks Annabeth. Well, I am here in the shooting practice arena. On one side we have Elsa and on the other we have Leo. I'm going to come over to Elsa now, and ask her what she's planning on doing tonight.

"So Elsa, what do you think about the person you're going to be fighting against tonight?"

"Well, um... I don't even know who you are, so would you mind telling me that?" Elsa asked.

"Oh, sorry about that. I'm Jason Grace. So, back to my question."

"Ok. I feel like I might have made the wrong choice picking him to duel against, with the fire stuff and all. When I asked him to duel, I didn't even know that. I'm not sure what to expect from him tonight, but if I put my mind to it, I believe I can do it. _I believe I can fly! I believe I can touch the sky!"_

"Hey... that's my theme song!" Jason complained.

"Why?"

" _Because I can actually fly."_ He stopped and looked at the camera. "Umm, now moving on to Leo! So, how do you think that this is going to go tonight?"

"FLAME ON!"

"Okay, see you tonight on the battlefield! Good luck! Back to Annabeth in Arendelle."

"And as the match starts in a mere 8 and a half minutes, we go down to the depths of the sea with Percy Jackson and eager fans, the sea creatures."

"Thank you, my wonderful Wise Girl." He winked. "Tonight the fish are very excited! The fish in the warmer parts of the ocean are defiantly rooting for Leo, but the fish in the colder part of the water, are rooting for Elsa. Now, I am here with warm water fishes, and I would like to ask them if they think that Leo really has the power to defeat Elsa.

"Bloop bloop. Bloop bloop bloop bloop...bloop. Bloop, Bloop, Bloop!" said one of the fish.

"Wow! Well the fish are definitely showing a great confidence in Leo today. They are hoping that because he is winging it, they could win the battle. They also added, 'FLAME ON!' Now I'm swimming right over to the cold water fish and I'm going to ask them if they think that Elsa knows what she is going up against tonight. Fishies?"

"Blo blah bloop. Bloo Beh bloop. Bloop blop."

"That's very interesting. They say that they believe that Elsa made a mistake and that she should never have asked for this duel that is about to take place. They say that they still think she will be ready. Thanks fish. Have fun watching the duel! Now lets go back to you, Miss Princess.

" That's great SEAWEED BRAIN!" Annabeth says, trying to ignore the fact that he just called her Miss Princess. "Oh, and look at the countdown! The duel is about to start in 3...2... and 1!"

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 **That's it for this chapter! Hope you enjoyed!**

 **Please review and we will be back with the next chapter soon!**


	3. First Quarter

"3, 2, and, 1," Annabeth finishes, and the duel begins. Neither of the two opponents knew who they were really up against, so they were being ready for anything. Anything at all.

Elsa quickly saw a red, hot fireball steaming toward her face. She did what was natural, she looked away and blasted. Suddenly, the fireball was turned into solid Ice. Leo's face went pale. He really didn't know who he was up against, but whoever it was, he would have to work a lot harder that just, "FLAME ON!"

"The duel has begun, and wow, has it begun quickly!" Annabeth continued. "Elsa just destroyed Leo's first shot, but I know when Leo is planning something. But I have no idea what Elsa is thinking of doing. Right now, they're circling each other, waiting for the other to make a move."

Everyone watching was really bored, because nothing was happening. Even the fish retreated back into the depths of the ocean. Soon after that, the water froze over, and you could tell that Elsa was about to do something big. "It looks like Elsa has started to raise herself up on an ice platform. But look - Leo's melting it from the bottom!" She gasped. "Wait a minute. Where's Percy? He was in the ocean with the fishies. DID HE GET FROZEN OVER?"

"No."

Annabeth screamed and looked behind her, where Percy was standing. Then she slapped him. "You're such an idiot." She looked back at the camera. "Did you get that on video?"

 _"Yep, we're live."_

In the sky, Frank took over. He started talking, except he was a hawk, so he couldn't speak English. *background duel music playing*

On the dueling field, Elsa had fallen from her platform, but Leo had been drained of power quickly. Elsa had the high ground. Then she said, "Don't try it. Don't try it."

Then Leo screamed madly, "You underestimate my power!" He let out a fireball, but for some reason it bounced off the ice and hit him in the face. He was burned, but he was also impenetrable to fire, so it didn't matter.

Annabeth came back on the air and said, "We've been informed that the first quarter of the duel will be over in one minute, and not much has been accomplished so far. So here's the countdown.

 _"60... 59... 58... 32... 27... 9... 8... 7... 6... 5... 4... 3... 2... 1!_ Math!"

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 **I am very sorry for the year long wait. I was kind of stuck doing other things. Thanks for the helpful reviews!**

 **-monkey221 ;)**


	4. Commercial Break!

"Whoops! I totally forgot," Annabeth laughed, causing a lot of offscreen laughter. "We've got a commercial break! Roll the clips."

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 _"It's the 39th annual ToyYodaThon. And we're celebrating with the hottest deals on the best Toy Yodas around! 100 credits for a 1980 Toy Yoda puppet, but at ToyYodaThon, it's just 13! Every Toy Yoda is on sale. Big Toy Yodas! Small Toy Yodas! Talking Toy Yodas! Ghost Toy Yodas! Toy Yodas with snakes! We even have Toy Yodas for the kids! (Yaaay) Crazy we are, you must be saying. But crazy you will be if you don't go to your local Toy Yoda dealer today! (ToyYodaThon is not to be confused with Happy Hondo Days.)"_

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 _"The snack that smiles back -_ _Goldfish!"_

 _"Hi! I'm Finn the goldfish, and I'm here with my friends Brooke, Gilbert, Xtreme, and Swimmington. Oh, and Percy."_

 _Percy takes over. "Hi, this is a PSA talking about how goldfish are not for eating and we should respect these kind, talking cheese crackers. Okay? Thanks."_

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 _"Tired of trying to stack all of your favorite Star Wars Show droids, but can't get them to stop moving?"_

 _"There's got to be a better way!"_

 _"Introducing the Star Wars Show statue from Gentle Giant. This limited edition collectible is made of a space age polymer that will look great in any home! It fits into a backpack, maes a beautiful engagement ring, and can cut thousands of julianne fries. Take it with you on vacation. Give it as a gift to a dad or a grad. Or put it on a shelf and admire it for generations. This limited edition statue won't be available forever. Here's how to order. Just kidding, you can't order it yet, but when it's available we'll let you know. Sorry. No COD's."_

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"Um, okay, I think that's enough for our commercials for today." She whispered, " _Why do we have so much Star Wars stuff?_ Anyway, folks, we're onto the second quarter in two minutes! See you later!"

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 **Two of those commercials are from the Star Wars Show on Youtube. If you want to go check them out, they were featured in the Star Wars Show 100th Episode Spectacular.**

 **Please remember to review!**


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